In honor of the ridiculous part of a new law recently signed by the Missouri governor that prohibits teachers and their students from being “friends” on Facebook, I give you the following lyrics to be sung to the tune of Rodgers & Hammerstein’s “The Farmer & The Cowman” from the Broadway musical Oklahoma!

The teacher and the student cain’t be friends. Oh, they say the teacher and the student cain’t be friends. One of ‘em likes to educate, the other likes to vegitate, But there’s no reason why they cain’t be friends.

Internet users should stick together, Internet users should all be pals. Teachers expand their students’ brains, Most wouldn’t even think of molestin’ ‘em at all. (repeat)

I’d like to say a word for the teacher, They do their best and don’t make a lot They get a bunch of extra special training, So you caint blame ‘em for complaining about what little they got.

The teacher is a good and thrifty citizen, No matter what the critics say about ‘em. You seldom see ’em barfin’ in restroom sinks Unless somebody else is buyin’ drinks.

But the teacher and the student cain’t be friends. Oh, they say the teacher and the student cain’t be friends. The good student sure aims to please, while the good teacher ain’t a breeze, But that’s no reason why they cain’t be friends.

Internet users should stick together, Internet users should all be pals. Teachers with a Facebook page, Are just using a tool in the Internet age. (repeat)

I’d like to say a word for the Missouri governor, The road he treads is difficult and stoney. He signs into law a lot of legislation But this one I sure am feelin’ that it’s phony!

The teacher should be sociable with the student If he or she invites ‘em to be a friend on a website Don’t treat him like a louse, Just accept him or her with a click of your mouse. But be sure you don’t have any chats late at night!

Internet users should stick together, Internet users should all be pals. Teacher should teach without sexual yearning, So students should be able to concentrate on just learning.

The teacher and the student should be friends. Oh, the teacher and the student should be friends. One of ‘em likes to give out homework, the other likes to social network, But there’s no reason why they cain’t be friends.

Facebook and social media sites are useful tools for teachers, students, parents, and learning institutions. This law is clearly a mistake that attempts to take away a tool because it was misused. That’s like banning farmers from using shovels because one farmer once used it to whack a rancher in the head, instead of digging a hole for a plant. Silly. I work for Trend Micro and opinions expressed here are my own.

By: Richard Medugno